Live a safe, predictable life and you’ll never know just how extraordinary you really are. Make the circumstances of your life challenging enough to draw your greatness to the surface.
Fiona Harrold, Be Your Own Life Coach
The Attitude of Gratitude – week 8
These are the things I’m grateful for from the last week:
Monday: Dreams.
Tuesday: Wheat-free chocolate biscuits.
Wednesday: Tambourine stick arrived.
Thursday: Getting out of the house for the first time in weeks – found some turquoise cushions and plant pots.
Friday: 1:1 video call with Michele Blatchford.
Saturday: Kiwi fruit.
Sunday: still awake in the early hours, so I used the time productively – self-care questions & sorting through things ready for moving.
Quote on change & growth
All growth involves saying goodbye, in order to say hello. Leaving, whether it is the womb of the family, an unhappy but familiar relationship, or a secure but dull job may seem difficult, but very often one part of life has to be released before a fresh one can take its place.
Fiona Harrold, Be Your Own Life Coach
Thoughts on Change
Change can be a rollercoaster. If you love rides it can be thrilling, exciting, amazing. If you’d rather keep your feet on the ground even the smallest ‘coaster can be terrifying, gut-churning, dizzying.
It also depends on the type of rollercoaster. If you love big rides or prefer little ones, if you love all the twists and bends or you prefer a more even track. If you love fast rides or prefer a more sedate pace.
Types of change are like different rollercoasters, and it all depends on the size, format and speed you’re able to embrace, and which overwhelms your senses. Which types of change leave you screaming with exhilaration and which ones leave you screaming to get off.
Sometimes when we get off change’s rollercoaster we’re buoyed, sometimes we feel as flat as a pancake. Either way we have to find out feet again, re-orient ourselves and carry on. The ride doesn’t last forever, even if we want it to, even if we don’t know when we’ll get off.
Just remember to breathe. Enjoy what you can, even if it’s just the scenery while you try to make it through the ride itself. Breathe, and know that when it’s all over, you made it.
Intuitive dance – Mantra/ setting the intention to remove negativity
After waking up feeling stuck in a negative vibe recently I decided by the afternoon I couldn’t continue like that any more. I’ve started using intuitive dance as a way of shifting the energies around so they can be worked out of my body. That way they don’t stagnate and just sit there like they did before I started this.
Anyway, this time when I started dancing I found myself singing a little mantra/ setting of intention. I’m going to share it here because it actually cheered me up and I could feel the negativity shifting.
- Start by gently moving, setting the intention with: Move this negativity about. Move it all out. Move it all out. Repeat this three times.
- Now start moving more purposefully, really using moves that signify moving the energy around. Say: Moving the negativity about. Then use movements representing moving the negativity out, or pushing it out, saying: Moving it out. Moving it out. Do this for as long as you feel you need to.
- When you feel you’ve got enough or all of it out, wind down with: Moved all that negativity out. Moved it all out. Moved it all out. Repeat this three times.
- Shake your hands, legs and body a bit to release any excess energy, then take three deep breaths and centre.
To recap:
- Move this negativity about. Move it all out. Move it all out. (Repeat three times)
- Moving the negativity about. Moving it out. Moving it out. (Repeat as often as needed)
- Moved all that negativity out. Moved it all out. Moved it all out. (repeat three times)
The Attitude of Gratitude – week 7
These are the things I’m grateful for from the last week:
Monday: Some quiet time to myself for a few hours.
Tuesday: Two interviews with Sarah Durham Wilson that really spoke to where I am in my own healing journey. (No. 1 & No. 2)
Wednesday: Got three lots of 5* feedback on my Etsy shop.
Thursday: The right to vote.
Friday: The sunshine returned.
Saturday: Being able to express myself through poetry and writing.
Sunday: Talking with Mum and sharing about experiences.
The healing power of giving yourself the same understanding you give others
When you start looking into Shadow work, emotional responsibility, processing or authenticity you can be faced with quite a bit of discomfort. Habits, thought patterns and ways of behaviour can be brought to light, and it can be difficult not to feel like you’re a bad person/ failure/ insert-your-own-term.
Some of us have a habit of being harder on ourselves than on other people, and when confronted with the things that are holding us back from deeper healing it’s no different. Facing these aspects of ourselves is not easy, it’s not comfortable, and it can feel rather overwhelming. It is all too easy to fall into berating ourselves, giving our inner critic an even bigger stick to beat us up with.
One of the biggest things that has helped me this last week (in this respect) is accepting that I sometimes have not-so nice thoughts relating to a friendship that ended badly. On a more spiritual level I know this person has taught me some incredibly important life lessons that are going to make me stronger and more aware for the future. The more ‘human’ level of me is still nursing wounds and working through processing. When a bad thought or grumble came up I’d be really mad with myself, thinking, “why can’t I let go of this? This is not forgiving or spiritual.”
My breakthrough came when I realised I wouldn’t say this to someone else. Yes, I’d try to help them to see the lessons to be learned from the experience, but I’d let them work through things and I wouldn’t berate them like I do myself. I told myself, “Okay, you’re having these thoughts, but you’re working on things. You’re still healing, you’re still processing. You can see some of the larger spiritual lessons, but your brain needs a bit of time to catch up. Stop worrying about having these thoughts and whether they’re spiritual or not. Stop beating yourself up.”
Don’t make yourself a victim of yourself.
– Brene Brown, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway
And you know what? I realised I had built up such a complex about having these thoughts that once I accepted I have them, and I don’t need to beat myself up about them (because I am doing the work to try and learn and move on), things started to shift. The fearful feelings relating to this lessened significantly and I started getting further insight. It’s like a weight has been lifted, and because I’m no longer on the lookout for where I’m ‘failing’ spiritually I am thinking less of that person and situation.
Sometimes we have to face our mistakes, and though we may be spiritually aware (to whatever degree) we shouldn’t beat ourselves up for tripping up now and then. Sometimes we need to accept our faults and learn to forgive ourselves. We need to allow ourselves to feel what we feel instead of pushing it down. Then we can use that mental energy to concentrate on working through our side of things, and healing.
Two quotes on self-worth & self-love
True self-worth is a sense of internal composure that gives you complete freedom. When you have it your life choices will spring from genuine desires and talents, rather than a need to achieve or impress.
…to take responsibility for your own happiness and to take steps to create the life you want is to show maturity and generosity. To upgrade your levels of self-worth and happiness is neither self-centred nor indulgent, and it will actually have a positive effect on all those around you.
From: Be Your Own Life Coach by Fiona Harrold
Thoughts on Hope
Hope is not some blind, unattainable thing; wishful thinking. Hope is the belief that no matter how difficult things may seem or feel there is a way forward. Hope is when all we know falls away but we are willing to find a way through, to find a new path through the rubble.
Hope is the seed we plant that blossoms as we find a way to make this new world work. Sometimes it wilts with pieces of us over the years, but if you carry it in your heart it will never be extinguished.
* this is adapted from a post I made in January on my other blog.
The Attitude of Gratitude – week 6
These are the things I’m grateful for from the last week:
Monday: Essential oils.
Tuesday: Hot water bottles
Wednesday: Help from a very spiritually aware lady.
Thursday: Learning about embodiment and earthing.
Friday: Aura-Soma oils, and their creator Vicky Wall.
Saturday: Our beautiful garden, and the beautiful plants, trees and flowers in it.
Sunday: Another day of glorious sunshine before the rain.
